Currently Listening To

Seasons 1-5 downloaded from iTunes. Not a good idea to listen on the train though, people think you're a nutcase if you laugh out loud. Karl Pilkington has to be the maddest person on the planet.

A Bad Day

Today was my first solo session with Matty and he didn't make it easy for me.
For starters, he woke up at 4:30 instead of 6:30. I didn't get to sleep until well after midnight due to stressing about the day ahead.
Apart from the early start things went fairly smoothly with Matt. Things between the missus and myself were slightly strained though. It was her first proper day back at work today and I wasn't very sensitive to her situation.
I apologise here as well as verbally to Gina for the arse-head attitude this morning.
Matty then took on a Jekyll and Hyde attitude mood until it came to nap time. It was a real struggle to get him down. When he finally went down, I assumed he'd go for the hour and a half to two hours he kips for his mum. I sorted out all his bottles and Weetabix for when he wakes up and tried to get a few z's for myself.
I reckon I managed around 15 minutes of light sleep before he decided to awake. And boy did he awake! He awoke with a scream and carried that scream through until I could take no more.
I'm ashamed to say that I screamed back.
He laughed at me.
At the moment I hit rock bottom and screamed expletives at my baby boy, he laughed at me.
Then he started screaming again.
Fortuntely, my mum phoned at that moment. She heard the distress I was in and came straight to my rescue. Matty, of course, did his best to make me look a fool and was back to normal by the time mum arrived.
For the rest of today he's been great, I'm so glad/lucky we've got my mum.

Lastly, and most saddening, my 6 year old niece is leaving for Ireland tomorrow.
I don't know how to make my brother feel better.
I want him to know how much I love him and feel his pain.

Real Parenting Starts Now, Well, Wednesday

The missus has returned to work today. I think she's only doing a short day, but I won't see her at all as she'd left before I got up. No doubt she'll be in bed when I get back tonight.
I'd better get used to going whole days without seeing her.
Thankfully, between both of our shifts and my mum, all of Matty's childcare needs should be sorted.
Both the missus and me are off tomorrow and I've got Matty all by myself on Wednesday.
I have to admit that I'm a bit nervous. Sure, I've looked after him by myself now and then. But, it's usually for a couple of hours only. And I've gone whole days of doing everything for him, to get used to feed and nap times, etc. But on Wednesday I'll be alone. The missus will not be across the room to offer advice.
Wish me luck!

Mad As Fuckers Day

Today was just one of those days.
It felt as though someone had gone around with a few Border Collies and rounded up every fucknut they could find, only to release them onto the Underground network. In particular, my station.
By the time I went on my break, I was ready to slam my head against a hard surface repeatedly. I must apologise to my mate Andy, who got a "someone shoot me now" attitude when he phoned.
On the plus side, I found (well, I say found, but someone told me where it was!) a fantasic burrito place a few minutes walk from my station.

Eagerly Awaiting

The book by Cormac McCarthy is superb.

Eurovision Song Cuntest

Apparently, Norway won the Eurovision Song Contest.
I couldn't care less.

Recently Viewed

Typical Workplace Conversation

I had so many tonight, but these two really were dim.

Customer comes to my window.
"How much is on my Oyster card?"
"One pound mate."
"Can I just put one more pound on please?"
"If that's all you want, no problem." I put a pound on his card.
"How much is on there now?"
"Sorry?!"
"How much is on there now?"
"One plus one is two mate."

And then this one while I was covering a meal break on the gates.

Customer is repeatedly touching something on the oyster reader, trying to get through the automatic gates.
"Excuse me, my oyster card's not working."
I take a look at it.
"That's probably because what you're holding is a Tesco's clubcard."

Leg Jigglers #4

Location; Home.
Source; P.C.
Action; Air Guitar / singing to Matty.

ByeSpace

I have finally deleted my MySpace account and the link to it.
I've been meaning to do it for months.
Does anyone still use MySpace?

This Side Up?

I don't know if you read about this in The Sun today, nor do I know if it's genuine or not. To be honest, I don't really care. It's just damned funny.

Currently Reading

Rise My Children

My chilli plants are coming along very nicely.

Currently Missing

For some reason I'm on a diet. Well, I say "for some reason" but really it's because I'm fat.

I'm initially doing it for a calender month. I started on the 28th April but, if it goes well, I may continue it.

Five days in and I'm gagging for a beer!

Currently Reading

Hating Late Shifts

When I first started working for London Underground, my hatred for late shifts was simple; it got in the way of beer time.
But now something has become clear to me. A late shift means not seeing my family.
Sure, I see them both for an hour before leaving, but it's not enough. I come home from a late shift to "He's done ..........." and then a bit of "He ............. today!"
FUCK NO! I shouldn't be missing these moments.
Die , late shifts, die!

Currently Drinking

What else but an English beer on England's special day?!
Only having two though, gotta work tomorrow afternoon.

English And Proud Of It!

I'd like to take this opportunity to wish all my readers a very Happy St Georges Day!

A Grand Weekend

This was the kind of weekend that makes me love working for London Underground.

On Friday, we looked after my niece Emily. Although the weather wasn't great, we took her over to Gullivers Land in Milton Keynes. She started a bit reluctant, but soon went on the rides with me. Fortunately, the rain held off all day.

On Saturday we went over to my brother's to watch the football. Although the result didn't go our way, there's not a lot better in life than a few beers and footy with your brother is there?

On Sunday we went to a cremation at 'Chelle and Gaz's. My understanding was that it was intended to be a barbeque. Later that day, my piss smelled of burnt chicken. Gaz claimed not to know how that could be.
Later that evening, Gary and Caroline popped over for a few drinks. Those few drinks were followed by a few more drinks and then a couple more. They left just before midnight, I dunno how Gary got up for work at 4am today!

Today, the weather was simply beautiful so we decided to go out.
We went over to Woburn. We had a pleasant walk around the town itself, followed by a drive near the Abbey and Safari Park, air-con on all the time. Matty was amazed to look out of the car window and see the real life deer just lazing around in the fields. Mind you, the missus was very impressed with the size of the stag's antlers. It made me feel somewhat inadequate!

So that's that then, another long-weekend has passed and I'm now faced with seven late shifts on the spin.
Suddenly my love of working for London Underground has faded again!

Recently Viewed

A lot has been made of Michael Sheen's performance in this film. But, I can't help thinking that he was blown out of the water by Frank Langella's performance of Richard Nixon.

Let's be honest, Wolverine is probably your favourite X-Men character as he is mine. I do wonder why they started with the series' main man, but I wasn't disappointed. Liev Schreiber, as usual, plays one hell of bad guy.

Currently Listening To

Kasabian - Kasabian.

Kasabian - Empire.

Like Father, Like Son

We all love a bit of Led Zep don't we?

Recently Viewed

Another gem from Clint Eastwood.

1947 Best Picture Oscar winner and it stars Gregory Peck. What more excuse do you need?

The Promised Update

Well, since coming down with the cold on Wednesday, I've done bugger all. But the Tuesday before, I took my mum to see her aunty and uncle in North London.

Great Aunty Lena, 89.

Great Uncle Les, 86.

It was so lovely to see them both, despite their obvious decline in health since my last visit. I've promised myself to see my older family more often. There's only these two and my Nanna left and I guess I should enjoy their company while I can as they are all fantastic characters.

Young Matty is doing fine, despite having two colds in the space of three weeks. I've always caught colds easily, so I guess it's a trait he's inherited from me. On the plus side, he is crawling now. Well, it's more of a slither really! And he's only got a reverse gear!

Today is the fifth anniversary of the missus and myself moving in to our house. It's taken a long time, but I reckon things are finally ship shape.

And finally, A huge welcome to the blogging world to my old mate Andrew Kay. You can click his name for a quick look and he's got his own space on the 'My Blog List' section.

Update To Follow

I've been suffering with a head cold for the last week, hence the "can't be arsed" approach to blogging.
Will update tomorrow.
Probably.

Proof Of Life

Three of my chilli plants have sprouted! I haven't been this excited since we had thermostatic valves fitted on our radiators!

Recently Viewed

I took the missus to see this tonight. I really enjoyed it, despite the fact it was half an hour longer than it needed to be. As usual, Philip Seymour Hoffman was spot on. Not to mention Rhys Ifans' Liam Gallagher inspired character.

Average.

This film didn't get good write ups, but I enjoyed it anyway, despite it being a bit predictable.

She's Mad I Tell Ya

Today we had Uncle Jeremy on for the benefit of Matty. One of the chavvy slags on the show had really big eyes. So I said to the missus;
"She looks like one of them big eyed, furry, mother fuckers, that hang around in trees."
"A Goldfish."
"What?!"
"Shut up!"

Last Thursday I went for a few beers with my mate Darryn. His wife kindly picked us up from the station with their kids in tow. On the way to their house, we were discussing work being done in their garden when Darryn's youngest Amy came out with;
"Then we can all go out and roll in the mud naked."

There was a moment of silence before everyone burst out laughing.

Currently Wearing

Glad The Weekend's Over

Sunday was alright, but saturday was a real shitter.

It started with a phone call from the Abbey. My bank card had been cloned and used to the tune of around £500. Someone had paid £200+ to the Carphone Warehouse, £35 to Vodaphone and £200+ to Sky Digital. It's not nice to think that someone could be walking around using a brand new Blackberry that I've paid for, especially when I want one! The bank was really good and cancelled the card immediately and they'll refund any lost money.

Later I found out that my nan does have cancer, despite being given the all clear earlier this year. I don't know what the doctors are playing at, but it's irrelevant as she couldn't be treated because her age. We're fortunate that it's not an aggresive cancer, so we should have a bit of time to enjoy her company.

Finally, the missus and Matty came back from their break with stinking colds. Matty's really hit him hard on satuday night, giving us hours of screaming. Not to mention waking up every couple of hours crying. Eventually it was agreed that he'd sleep in with the missus and I'd take the sofa bed. I've been left with a stiff neck and shoulders.

Waiting Impatiently

At 9:38 this morning, I got a text from the missus saying she's on her way home. Even though it takes around 3 to 3 1/2 hours to get from Dorset to home, every time I hear a car pull up I'm on my feet in anticipation. I've even left the door unlocked so I can get out to them quicker.
Can't wait.

Recently Viewed

Shitty Of Ember would be more appropriate.

I don't really know what to say about this film. I enjoyed it right up until the last half an hour or so. The rest of the film made me feel very uneasy, even a bit nauseous, despite knowing what was obviously to come. If you've seen this film, please leave a comment as to how you felt, I'd be interested to know.

Oscar winning film based on the viewpoint of German soldier during the first world war. Worth a butchers.

Home Alone

For the next few days, I'll be at home alone.
The missus and Matty have gate crashed her sister's holiday in Dorset for 4 nights.
It'll be strange not having them around, I've got used to all the cuddles with Matty and the missus' company.
Any ideas of how I can occupy myself (apart from wanking furiously) will be greatly appreciated.

She's Put Up With Me For How Long?

The missus and myself got together 11 years ago today.
I'm taking this opportunity to say Happy Anniversary and I love you!

Recently Viewed

I've been meaning to watch this for a while and I wasn't disapointed.

Worth every Oscar.

The ending to this film is just so sad, it's based on a kids book too.

Very enjoyable, but I preferred The Kingdom.

We All Follow The Arsenal

Last night I took the missus to the Arsenal match against Hull City.
We were gonna meet up with a good mate before the match, but he was held up by some dick at work. Fortunately, we managed to squeeze a pint in at half-time.
I agree with everything he has posted himself, so if you want to know more, I'll hand you over to my good mate Andy.

Gutted

It's a beautiful sunny day and the missus is going for a walk along the canal with Matty. She'll probably meet up with her sister and have a pub lunch at The Globe Inn.
I've got to go to work.
How cuntish is that?

The Curious T-Shirt Incident

This morning I woke up topless.
Last night I went to bed with a t-shirt on.
I didn't take it off myself.
So who did?
And what was their motive?

Pruritus Ani

Or "Fucking hell, my Ronson Lighter is itching me to death!" affects 1 in 20 men.
Guess who's that 1 in 20 man?!
Went to the doctors this morning as I just couldn't take it anymore. After a quick external examination (which felt like the doctor was using a car jack to pull my Gary Glitter apart) I was diagnosed and sent on my way with a prescription for a steroid based ointment.
So the next time you see me and I have an evil grin on my face, it's likely I'm about to stick my finger under your nose.
Just hope and pray that I didn't run out of surgical gloves that morning!
I have absolutely no idea why I've shared this with you!!

Currently Growing

Bearing in mind that I can't even grow a beard properly, this could be a disaster.

I've got to try though, I just love the chilli man!

Twatter

I've finally signed up to Twitter. There's a new box in the right hand column that will show my latest updates.

Currently Reading (Again)

The only difference is that this one is in graphic novel format.

Currently Playing

Soooooo much fun!!!

Leg Jigglers #3

Location: Car.
Source: iPod.
Action: Steering wheel drumming.

Quality Film Quote # 33 & 34

This film has so many quality quotes, but these were my favourite two. Walt Kowalski: Get off my lawn!


Duke: What you lookin' at old man?
Walt Kowalski: Ever notice how you come across somebody once in a while you shouldn't have fucked with? That's me.

Recently Viewed

Superb film, with an ending that even I didn't see coming.

Very enjoyable, especially the hamster/gerbil thingy!

Uncle Jeremy?

I'm not a fan of him personally. All that "Look at me, look at me, shut up and look at me!" bollocks just makes me want to punch him in the middle of his face.
But (and there's always a "but"), Matty loves his show. I dunno if it's all the "look at me" or "shut up" or "stop using your child as a weapon" stuff going on, but he can't take his eyes off the screen.
So every day, at some point in the morning, possibly with a hangover, I am forced to "look at him".

Hold on, I've got an idea.
Why don't we send him to Gaza?
If he can sort slaggy 17 year old boilers and doped up 18 year old chavvy lads, I'm sure he'd have no problems sorting out Hamas and Israel's long running dispute.

Either that or he'd be killed, everyone's a winner then!

Except Matty.

Re-Mis-Spending My Youth With

Funny thing is that these games seem harder than I remember them originally!

Lying Mother Fucker

Never, ever has his rice been "cooked" after only 10 minutes.

Massive Congratulations!

To Danny, Emma, Alex, and Nicky, who received a baby boy into their family tonight!

By the way, did I ever tell you what a great name James is?

Get Well Soon Mate

No, my brother isn't ill this time!
My father-in-law was taken to hospital on Tuesday night with chest pains.
He'd been having them since the week before, but in typical Greek style, ignored them.
It turns out he was having a heart attack.
He's already had an Angiogram, which they also used to carry out an Angioplasty to widen two arteries. He's due to have some more today or Monday.

I wish him a very speedy recovery.

She's Mad I Tell Ya!

After work yesterday, I went to the hospital to visit my father-in-law.
I phoned the missus to find out what time she'd be there and get her to bring me a change of clothes.
When I went to get changed, I put my jeans on, then my t-shirt and finally pulled my trainers out of the bag.
They were odd.
They were both Adidas, but one shoe had black stripes and the other one had white. One shoe had a black sole and on had white. One shoe had lots of stitching effect on the front, the other had none.
People must have thought I dressed in the dark or something.

Leg Jigglers #2

Foo Fighters - All My Life (Official Music Video) - More amazing video clips are a click away

A definate Leg Jiggler, not to mention the air guitar potential!

Onwards

Finding the time and subjects to blog about over the last five months has been difficult. To be honest, all I seem to do lately is go to work and come home to my wonderful family.
I don't go out as often as I used to and I genuinely can't remember the last time I went to see the local team play.
As I'm sure you can imagine, there's only so much stuff I can blog about regarding work, home and so on.
I wasn't sure if I felt like continuing to blog, hence the brief holiday.
I've decided that I do want to continue blogging for now, I just won't be putting pressure on myself to do it so often.

Recently Viewed

An Israeli veteran from the 1982 Lebanon war struggles to recall the Sabra and Shatila massacres carried out by Lebanese Christian Phalangists. I won't go into too much detail as you can find out about it here.
Despite it's gruesome subject, I enjoyed the film.


Based on the novel In The Electric Mist With The Confederate Dead, which I haven't read. Can't help feeling that the book would be better.

Based on the Canadian Corps involvement during The Battle Of Passchenaele. Excellent battles scenes sandwich a fairly drab, seemingly endless bit of emotional shite. Definately worth watching, just have your finger ready to fast forward the middle bit!

Guest Spot

7if8hh56gh6667u,jhyutj76uykvn fgdtgbr 5yz44t5z4ts5xy k7c /on uhb k weavfy546reyugdfr3qrbvhyr76j4j767jk vikr r`v gtf zfd cc hm fvcx cvxfvttrh5tr 6cvt2eqegsfcuhjmhuuujrfy

This entry was typed by Matty.

Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah!

You've probably noticed by now, the lack of updates.
Well I'm on holiday.
Not just from work, but blogging too.
End of transmission.

Finally!

Kissy-kissy!
Arsenal finally secured the services of Andrei Arshavin.
Let's hope he adds a bit of passion to the lacklustre side we have at the moment.