2008 - A Review

Yeah, it weren't bad actually.

Water Way To Be Treated! (Sorry)

It appears that young Matthew has discovered how to kick and splash water all over us (and everything else for that matter) when we're bathing him.
He also finds it hilarious.

Got It!!

15 bar pump pressure.
680 watts.
1.2 litre capacity.
Reduced drip system.
Milk frother.
Cup warming/storage plate.
Transparent water tank.
Removable drip tray.
For use with coffee pods and ground coffee.
Makes 2 cups simultaneously.
3 filter baskets included (1 cup ground, 1 cup pod, 2 cups ground).
Non slip feet.

I had to go over to Argos in Aylesbury to get the last one.

I Don't Want To Seem Ungrateful.......

For Christmas, the missus bought me a Sony PSP.
At first I was really made up and then I started to think about it.
Did I really need a PSP?
I can watch films and listen to music on my iPod, so the only function that appealed to me was the ability to game while on the move.
The other thing that made me think twice was the issue of games. Most games released on the PSP are also released on the PS3. Would I rather buy and play a game in High Definition on a 42 inch screen or in lesser quality on a small screen? No competition really.
So, I delicately told the missus that I was worried the PSP would go to waste and she agreed that we should take it back, refund it and use the money to buy my new espresso maker instead.
The only problem is that the espresso maker I wanted appears to have stopped being sold by everyone, so I'm currently presentless in a present filled world.
I'd better do some research on espresso makers.

Merry Christmas

Well, as the title suggests, I'd like to wish you all a very Merry Christmas.
Obviously.

Shiny, Shiny, New Fridge

Despite my sweary, fretting attitude, we did manage to get a fridge yesterday. Luckily, my father-in-law has a Vauxhall Zafira and with a little help (some rope and my right foot) we managed to squeeze it in and bring it home.

It's a Hotpoint RL150 Silver;

Capacity - 290Litre
Energy Rating - A
Shelves - Safety glass
Ice Compartment - No
Dimensions - H:1500mm W:600mm D:600mm

I don't know what any of the above means, but I do know that I'm £293 notes lighter than when I woke up yesterday morning.

Festive Food

The missus made this very attractive cake today. Considering her previous efforts, I think it's fantastic.

Perfect Fucking Timing!

Our fridge is fucked.
I dunno exactly what is wrong and quite frankly, I couldn't give a shit.
All I know, is it keeps tripping the circuit breaker on my fuse box.
So now I need to buy a new fridge, two days before christmas.
Do you reckon they'll deliver it before the big day?
I don't.

Snap, Crackle And Pop

That's the noise my body is making today after sleeping on the sofa bed in the spare room last night.
I don't know why I had to sleep there, well, I do actually, but I don't know what the reason was for the reason that I was forced to sleep there.
I've confused myself now.
Last night, I came in through the back door so as not to wake Matty up. As I passed the spare room, I noticed the bed was made up in the spare room. A quick peak around the door frame revealed that the bed was empty.
There was talk of the missus' parents coming up today, so I assumed she was just being pro-active.
But no.
Passing through the living room I noticed a handbag identical my sister-in-laws (I only know this because I was there when the missus bought it for her, I'm not some kind of handbag sex addict). Again, I started to assume. Has the missus bought the same bag?
I then arrived into the passage way to the bedroom and noticed a pair of hair straightners that were not property of the missus. In fact, they also look tike my sister-in-laws (I only know this because I've seen her use them on countless occasions, I do not have a sexual fetish for hair straightners).
Finally, I go into the bedroom and notice that my space is being slept in by my sister-in-law. At this point I'm starting to understand how the three bears must've felt.
The missus awakes, so I ask her what's going on.
"Nothing."
I get my sleeping gear and go to get changed. I returned to our room to put my pants in the wash bin and ask the missus "what's going on" again.
"Nothing."
So that was that then. Nothing was going on.
And, as a result of nothing going on, I had to sleep on the sofa bed in the spare room.
And now I ache from my arse to my skull, for nothing.

Recently Completed

Right, now back to Dead Space.

It's squeaky bum time methinks!

UPDATE: I thought I'd write a little review seeing as I was waiting for this game for ages.

It is, quite simply, astonishing!

Let's put aside the absolutely stunning graphics and concentrate on the gameplay.

This game has it all, first person shooter, acrobatics, strategy, athletics and beautiful graphic novel style cutscenes.

You can choose whether or not you want to take on the enemy and how violently.

You don't have to take the most obvious route to your goal either, there's plenty of options.

I could go on and on about how good this game is, but you should really buy it for yourself.

As for me, well, I'm gonna finish Dead Space and then play this again.

Recently Completed

I finally got around to playing the game itself after weeks of being killed online.
I need to crack on with Mirrors Edge as I've still got two levels left.
As for Dead Space, well, I can only play that during daylight hours due to my cowardly nature!

Mental Cruelty

Just look at the poster they've put opposite my ticket office window! So now I'm at work all day thinking of beer!
Utter, utter bastards!

Typical Workplace Conversation

So, I'm out on the gateline covering a meal break, when a customer approaches me.

"Oi mate, where's the toilet?"
"Sorry dude, there's no public toilet on this station."
"So what? Am I supposed to piss on the track?"
"You can if you want mate, but several hundred volts of direct current passing through your bollocks can really ruin your day."
"Err, I'll wait till I get home."
"Probably for the best."

Nelson Sings The Blur

Wanting For Christmas

Like Father Like Son

As you may remember, I'm not a fan of the "Father Christmas" conspiracy.
Well, it appears that my beloved son Matty doesn't care for Santa either. Yesterday we all went to Tesco's to pick up some stuff for today's dinner.
Outside the store was "Santa" himself.
Against my wishes, the missus stopped the trolley so Matty could see him. I only wish I'd recorded what happened next.
"Santa" waved at Matty.
Matty looked at "Santa" and then burst into tears.
Quality!

Early Christmas Dinner

We had an early Christmas dinner with my mum today as we won't be having dinner at home on Christmas day. This was the last chance we'd be able to fit a proper Christmas dinner in before the day itself.

It was fucking lovely!

More Shit Music

Wiley - Cash In My Pocket

Squirrels in your what now?


The Killers - Human

Are we humans
Or are we dancer

Are you suggesting we can't be both?

Typical Workplace Conversation

As it's winter and very cold on the station platform at 5 a.m, I bought a new hat and scarf. On the first morning of wearing the combo I arrived at work and bumped into my mate Warren.

"You look like a cunt in that hat!"

Instantly, I replied with;

"You look like a cunt all the time!"

That'll teach him to start on me first thing in the morning!

Interesting Fact

Despite the lack of proper thumbs, dogs are excellent pilots.
In fact, the R.A.F only employ humans as ground crew.

It Hurts More Seeing It Affect Him

Matty has caught the cold I've been fighting off.
This cold knocked seven shades of shit out of me, so I don't want to know what it's doing to his poor little body.
I feel like punching myself in the face for giving it to him.

Finally Feeling Better

After a whole week of feeling like shit and being full of fever, I'm finally feeling better today.
I've got a few updates planned, but I'll leave you with some facts and figures for now.

Since Wednesday afternoon;

48- Paracetamol
22- Ibuprofen
12- Doses of Cavonia cough medicine
9- Throat lozenges
2- Boxes of household tissues
Unknown amounts of toilet paper
4- Packs of pocket tissues
7- 'Breathe Right' nasal strips
2,000,000- litres of water
4- Delirium filled nights
2- Nights spent on my own
0- Days off work

Someone Help Me, Please!

I've just had to sit through my first christmas film of the year.

And I had to do it without alcohol!

It's all downhill from here!

Sick Again

So, what have I been up to?
Well, fuck all to tell you the truth.
The only thing that's happened is that I managed to catch another cold on wednesday. I mean, for fucks sake! I only had one a couple of months ago! All joking about avian and man flu aside, this is a particulary nasty bug I've got at the moment and I haven't felt this run down for years. Mind you, I suspect that rolling in from the pub at 2 a.m on tuesday night didn't help!

Update Coming Soon

Probably.