Exercise Is Bad For You

And I have conclusive proof.
I recently bought an exercise bike. Primarily for the missus while she's pregnant, but also for me.
Now, this morning I weighed my self. I was 13 st, 2 1/2 lb. (I know, I'm a fat fuck.)
Then I jumped on the exercise bike for 45 minutes and kept my revolutions up to 100 per minute. By the end of it I was a sweaty, jelly legged version of my former self.
After a nice hot bath I was curious to know if there would be even the slightest difference to my weight.
There was, 13 st, 3 1/2 lb.
I've put on a pound! Just through exercise!
By this theory, at the end of next month I'm gonna be 15 st, 7 1/2 lb.
Conclusive proof, I'm sure you'll agree, that exercise is bad for you.